Fun Size Bytes (from @Tj)

Young guys: here’s some advice you’re going to ignore.

indefensible:

That girl you like? The one who you want to ask out, but you can’t?

Ask her out. Without delay.

Because what do you have right now? Nothing. Right now, you don’t have the girl. The girl, you do not have.

When you ask her out, she could reject you. That would blow. But it doesn’t diminish you, you’re left in the exact same position you’re in right now. Without the girl.

But she could say the only word in the world that really brings happiness. She could say ‘yes’.

For as long as I can remember, my mother has given me this advice. She says, “If you don’t ask, then the answer is no.”

(The implied rest of the sentence being: ‘if you do ask, the answer might be “yes”, or it might be the “no” that you’re afraid of.’)

I’m 37 years old and I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve called my mom to say:

“You know how you always say ‘If you don’t ask, the answer is no?’ well, I asked, and the answer was ‘yes’…”

There have been any number of situations, from work to life where not only did I get a “yes” but I got an easy yes, as in, the person was all too happy to fulfill whatever request I was making.

Or, what is even better, is that I asked/suggested something that they hadn’t considered, and they replied, “Oh…. sure, why not?”

Every time I checking into a (decent :-) hotel I ask, “Is there a better room available?” and finding out there was a cancellation and getting a much, much better room for the same price. 99 times out of 100 the answer might be no. So what? I now have the same room I had before at the same price I had before.

One year at work that they couldn’t afford to give me a raise and so I asked for an extra two weeks of vacation. They felt badly about not being able to give raises, so they were particularly willing to consider this to assuage their guilty feelings. I got one extra week. Wasn’t all that I asked for, but it was still an extra week more than I would have had if I had done nothing except gone home and complained that I wasn’t getting a raise. Had they said “no” I could have at least gone home with the satisfaction of knowing that I asked.

She’s taught this to me my entire life, and I still have to remind myself to do it.

Repeat to yourself until it gets into your subconscious: “If you don’t ask the answer is no.”

You have nothing to lose. Literally.