suburbanreport: DID YOU EVER NOTICE that people wait in lines for COFFEE now?  When I was a kid, coffee was for old people.  Now that I’m old, coffee is for kids.  I guess I was “born” at the “wrong time.”  And coffee used to be a quarter.  Have you seen what the charge for coffee?  $2.75 for something called a “double whip, no fat, triple soy mocha latte.”  How about just some coffee, in a regular cup?  I think if I ordered a black coffee at Starbucks, the cashier, I mean, sorry, “barista” would gasp in shock.  I like the coffee they have here in the office at 60 minutes.  It’s free, and, since it’s 8 days old, there’s NEVER a line for it.  And I never get tongue tied when I try to order it.  BACK TO YOU, MORELY SAFER. I don’t know why I just realized it but I’m afraid when I grow up I’m going to be be Andy Rooney reincarnated. You know, after he dies. And he soul comes to possess me. More than it already does.

suburbanreport:

DID YOU EVER NOTICE that people wait in lines for COFFEE now?  When I was a kid, coffee was for old people.  Now that I’m old, coffee is for kids.  I guess I was “born” at the “wrong time.”  And coffee used to be a quarter.  Have you seen what the charge for coffee?  $2.75 for something called a “double whip, no fat, triple soy mocha latte.”  How about just some coffee, in a regular cup?  I think if I ordered a black coffee at Starbucks, the cashier, I mean, sorry, “barista” would gasp in shock.  I like the coffee they have here in the office at 60 minutes.  It’s free, and, since it’s 8 days old, there’s NEVER a line for it.  And I never get tongue tied when I try to order it.  BACK TO YOU, MORELY SAFER.

I don’t know why I just realized it but I’m afraid when I grow up I’m going to be be Andy Rooney reincarnated.

You know, after he dies.

And he soul comes to possess me.

More than it already does.

Sep 18 2009

Photo 57 notes

  1. oledocweirdbeard reblogged this from funsizebytes
  2. funsizebytes reblogged this from suburbanreport and added:
    don’t know why...just realized it but I’m afraid when...grow...
  3. yayaa reblogged this from yowhatsthehaps and added:
    I want this on my Tumblr. I just sold two Andy Rooney books. I don’t remember how I got them but I read them and I was...
  4. yowhatsthehaps reblogged this from suburbanreport and added:
    will probably read...million things today, but none of them will make me laugh as hard as...
  5. suburbanreport posted this
blog comments powered by Disqus